L is for LOVE
Love. Volumes have been written about it—songs, poetry, novels, how to’s, how not to’s, what’s “real” love and what isn’t. We seek it, long for it, and cannot live without it. It is the blood circulating through the body of life. Love is vastly nuanced and comes in a billion varieties. It looks different for every couple, every friendship, every connection to another human being. When you truly look at a person in your life that you love and notice the details of who they are, you can feel as if a shot of adrenaline is pulsing through your being. It’s how you stay friends, stay committed in a romantic relationship, and how you can enjoy being alive. We love people, pets, foods, countries, authors, music, oceans, laughter, movies, fashion, and fishing. The list is endless. How do we know that we love any of these things? I am suggesting that love can be experienced as the sensations of embodied appreciation. Noticing. Breathing. Feeling the appreciation as a body sensation. That is how we know love.
Example: if you love mocha almond fudge ice cream (yes I do), how do you know you love it? Likely you notice your taste buds creating a sensation in your body that is enjoyable. If you hate mocha almond fudge ice cream – well, your body tells you something else. If you don’t notice the ice cream at all, don’t notice yourself eating it, and don’t notice how that lands in your body as a sensation, then it becomes a mindless act--maybe to the point that you don’t even notice you ate the ice cream at all. It is a missed opportunity to experience love or lack of love. It is a missed opportunity to learn more about yourself.
It’s the same with everything and everyone in your life. Love is a practice of noticing and appreciating the details of what you notice. You can’t love without appreciation. You can’t appreciate without the practice of noticing and feeling your body sensations. Today, on purpose, notice something you appreciate about someone you love (hint: that person can be YOU). Then take the next step and tell them what you notice and how it makes you feel. Tell them that you appreciate them for it. If fear rises in your body as you think about expressing appreciation, just pause, notice the fear without judgment, breathe, and then express yourself anyway. Love is a practice, just like everything else in this wonderful, messy thing we call life.
Can you notice how appreciation amplifies the present moment and multiples the experience of love?